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Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Shit Tests and How to deal with them.


WTF is a SHIT TEST????

A Shit Test refers to something a woman does or says to a man in order to engender a response. If the man supplicates, he fails the shit test. If the man responds in a dominant fashion, he passes the shit test.
"How old are you?" : This came from an older girl (only by 2 years!!). I basically fucked this one by just actually saying my age. However, because I was confident and quite alpha it didnt really matter. I should have busted her balls about being older than me maybe. Other option: get her to guess, never tell her (stay mysterious), whether she is older or younger doesnt matter just stay the prize (ie: make her feel inferior for being either older or younger, whichever applies)

I've just split with my ex boyfriend (or something like this): When this happened to me I just tried to divert her away from this as fast as possible. It could start dropping them out of state way to fast so just plowed right back into another topic. I think really do anything could be better than letting her talk about this. My exact response was taking over the frame and saying basically "Yeah I just split up with a girlfriend too.." then I went into a spiel about freedom and independence and not wanting to be tied down and how exciting it was to live spontaneously.

"I dont think we/I should be doing this": I think if your coming in with a strong frame/alpha attitude you can plow this one completely. I plowed through it once with quite a shy girl on a night where I was feeling particularly confident. I just basically ignored she ever said it and continued gaming, resulted in kiss closure. Other option: just agree in a cheeky/cocky funny way and continue as before.

'hey, i saw this blahblah the other day, buy it for me!'- this one is popular around my area, the way i deal with this : 'hahaha, nice try' + pat on the back

"What are we doing here?".

At the time I said "I don´t know.", definitly the wrong answer.

Possible answers:

-nothing, just kiss her again
-"Well, I think we share a unique moment here"
-"Shhh, don´t ruin the moment"


You don't smoke weed, do you?
= What kind of stupid question is that? As if that shit even matters.

What do you do for work? = Bee keeper

"My friend is really lonely tonight can she come?"


"Aww damn, I was about to ask you if (insert a guy's name here) could come along, he's a real drag, his ex just ate his heart. How about it?"

"Is that your real name?"

"Jeez, You need proof of ID to get in everywhere these days." *fumble around your pockets*

"You don't drink do you."

"Only when i'm thristy. Oh! Alcohol. That reminds me..."
"Is my water weight shwoing that much" (this one only works with some girls)
"Can't live with out it."
"Please." [with a "give-me-a-break" attidue and expression]

"You're just trying to get into my pants."

"What are, joking? You're like a size 2, my nuts would be turned into crepes."

"Actually, I'm just trying to get them off you." (Works fabulous... I don't get women)

.....DarkCasanova.....